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I'm a 55 year old male and going through a rough separation.Now I can't even be happy around my grown kids.Can anyone till me why?

+1 vote
asked Nov 9, 2015 by Eugene Brenton  
I need help with my depression and stress because it's affecting my relationship with my grown children.It's gotten that bad I'm not even comfortable around my grandson when I'm babysitting him.So for god sake Please help
Country: Canada

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2 Answers

+1 vote
Profile Photo answered Nov 9, 2015 by goodwill ANGEL24K (33,360 points)   5 12 58
Depression sounds like a natural reaction for what you are going through ... At 55, you likely did not expect such a drastic change in your life. Change can be a scary thing, and it can be even scarier when it places into question the identity we had for ourselves. Unfortunately, there is no quick fix. I am sorry you are going through all this. The only real solution is to talk about it. You can always come here and talk to us, but I strongly urge you to seek professional and medical help. First, you want a complete examination by a doctor. There could be some physical ailment that is causing the depression. A therapist can really help you come to terms with what is going on and actually teach you ways to communicate with your children.

Have you told your kids how you feel? They are adults now and they will be able to understand you. Please tell them how you feel. Let them know how much you love them, and how you want to feel better. Maybe family therapy with them will help all involved.

Please do not lose hope. It will get better. Focus on the love you have for kids and grandson. We are here if you want to keep talking ...
+1 vote
answered Nov 11, 2015 by anonymous  
I lost a business, lots of money, and suffered from depression. My wife said she and the kids couldn't live like this anymore and wanted to move on.  
What I found out after several years of therapist, medication, living in a relatives basement,  and a seven day visit in the hospital was.
I had changed.  Somewhere I lost my self confidence, self worth, independence, and most of all hope. All the things that made me the man I WAS.
What I learned was:
-The more I talked about my problems the worse they got and longer they stayed with me.
- I had to stop feeling sorry for myself.
-I had to replace the negative thoughts with positive ones.
- what I put into my head came out in my actions.
- Find hope!
Medication can help, but is not the answer.  The answer is. You are in control of how you think. Change what goes into your mind and you will change what comes out.
This is not done overnight. But can be done!
Look at all the positives in your life.  
Sounds to me like you are a very luck man!!
 You have some great children and grandchildren who love you very much!  Pretty awesome!
Don't give up. One day at a time. Fake it until you make it!
If I can do it you can too!!

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