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Hi. Thank you for clicking this. I'm just a 14-year old girl going through A LOT. I feel really hopeless. I feel like my life will never get better. Everyone around me seems really happy -- but me. I'm beginning to lose faith in god, as well.

 I'm just a lonely homeschooled girl. All those worries are making it difficult for me to focus on my studies. I used to be good in school, but after all those worries, I'm not doing so well. But that's not the main problem. I've attempted to commit suicide multiple times, too (due to my worries). No one that I know understands me. Not my parents, not my siblings, or anyone else. I feel like I'm trapped really badly. All I can do is cry each night.

Do I have to wait till I die to gain peace? Should I still carry on with my suicide plan? Or will things get better? I also keep thinking if I'll be the same way the next year, and the year after. Please help me, if you can. I'd appreciate some support and hope.

P.S.: Just to clear things up, its not regular "teenage problems" -- like  having boyfriends, and all. Its other stuff which I don't feel comfortable sharing.

Thank you for reading,

Emmy
    

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5 Answers

+1 vote
by  
Hello Emmy,

I am a twenty-year old girl who grew up homeschooled and have been depressed on and off for the past four years, feeling so lonely and afraid. For about a year I was consumed with thoughts of suicide, and once in a while this will resurface, but it is so much better than it was. God used my hopelessness and disillusion with the world to show me that I rely completely on Him. He is the only reason I'm still alive, but I am so glad that I am. Because death is not a good thing, death is the result of evil. Life, truly living is so good. It may be hard to get back there, but it is so worth it, and you are not taking this journey alone.

Please do not take your own life, that isn't a solution. It may seem like the only way out, but know that for God all things are possible. I just found a key-chain cross with those words on it stuck in a wall at my job the other day. I was stressing out because of a lot of bad decisions I had made during this semester that were going to give me such bad grades that I'd loose my scholarship and not be able to come back to college for my senior year, wasting time, money, effort, pain, and disappointing a lot of people. But God was telling me that He was going to provide. That's when I found the cross. Two days later I got my final grades back and the lowest grade I got was a B- which was impossible. This is small in comparison to how much life and joy He has brought me and is continuing to bring.

God loves you. You. He thinks you are beautiful and kind and brave. He has plans for you. There is hope. Better things are coming. I promise. I pray this in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
by  
Thanks for your reply! I actually think I'm being unthankful and impatient. I will try to remain as calm as possible. Knowing about your life has restored my hopes, and my faith in god. Thanks so much for taking the time to reply. It means a lot to me! <3

-Emmy
0 votes
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Hi,

I've struggled with depression, including suicidal thoughts, and there's been a lot of improvement for me. I've been taking anti-depressant medications. Also I've been doing the 12 Steps of Emotions Anonymous. Part of my continued healing is that I share with others the solution.


1: We admitted we were powerless over our emotions--that our lives had become unmanageable.

2: We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

3: We made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

4: We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

5: We admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

6: We were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

7: We humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

8: We made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.

9: We made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

10: We continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.

11: We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

12: Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message and to practice these principles in all our affairs.


Emotions Anonymous, a fellowship of people recovering from emotional problems like anxiety, depression and anger.
http://www.emotionsanonymous.org

My story can be found here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8EysSD4rGew

Thanks for reading this.

May peace be with you,
Anonymous
0 votes
by  
In times like this please always attend the daily mass and pray the rosary before you sleep. Even if you feel tiresome , fight it. Do the assignments.
Do confession and receive the holy communion.
by  
Thanks for your help. I really appreciate it. I will try to follow the advice, if I can. Its good to know people cared enough to read -- and reply.  =)


-Emmy
0 votes
Profile Photo by Nash ANGEL3000+ (3.3k points)   2 6
I am so sorry to hear that you are having such hard times. You sound like a very nice and respectful girl. I want you to know that I was suicidal and felt like I would never be happy but the Lord has turned things around over time. I have been especially helped by reading about other people's answered prayers and angels. Maybe that will help you too. Anyway, I have had really bad experiences that made me suicidal, but God has changed the situation for me and he can do the same for you. Jesus loves you and I will pray for you.
by  
Thanks so much for taking the time to read, and reply. Also, thank you for your kind words. You sound nice and respectful, too. I will take your advice and be patient. =)

-Emmy
+1 vote
by  
Dear Emmy,

         I just want to say how proud I am of you to have the courage to open up and tell your story to us. Its hard enough to tell people close to you that your life is eating at you from the inside out and don't even know why at times...? I also want to say there is always hope because you are never alone in this life and the things that make you feel the way you do.  I also need you to know that I need you, the world needs you.. It may be hard to see but maybe I can give you some words of encouragement?  We need you sweet dear young lady because you hold the key to life that nobody in this big world has but we all share a piece of and that's individuality... You have a purpose to become something great! If you look deep inside your soul when you feel closed in and in a dark place all alone please look at that tiny light in heart. That tiny light is a gift to you and the world because even in the darkest room, darkest part of life that little tiny light thats stuffed deep in your loving soul goes a really long way... That light may hold the cure for cancer because you want to save children or grown ups. That light holds the keys to delivering a powerful speech or whisper of words that might just save a life or many lives. Things in life are so much easier to destroy, then to create.  So please I am asking you when you feel this way look inside all that pain, all that brokenness and find your light. I am a single dad of a son and daughter so please be strong and courageous like you already are because you may help or save my children's life one day. Opening up is a huge step to not feeling like you do. You're never alone you are needed always so don't hide your light from us be the diamond that you are meant to be and spread your light...
by  
Thanks for the help, sir. It helps to know people actually do care about other's problems. I really, really appreciate it. That was really encouraging.


-Emmy

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