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I care to much and it hurts me, how can I help when I do not have my emotions intact?

+1 vote
Hi I'm 16 years old. I have been severely bullied in the past. I struggle with depression and high anxiety. I have gotten help and now take medicine everyday. I'm doing much better but all I can think about is other kids in my place that didn't get to live to see today like I did. I feel like its my fault for not helping or not noticing fast enough. It kills me to know how cruel the world is and how so many people live with that. I feel almost guilty for living my life when other lose theirs. It doesn't seem fair that I get to wake up everyday feeling sorry for others when people wish they had the chance to wake up like I do. I just want to help everyone. I cry because I know I can't. Even now I feel bad complaining when others are worse off than I am. What can I do?
Country: United States
Profile Photo asked Oct 18, 2012 by Neighbors (150 points)   2

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3 Answers

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Profile Photo answered Oct 19, 2012 by faith ANGEL18K+ (19,830 points)   2 7 30
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Honey, you should never feel bad or guilty for wanting to help people and for feeling bad when you can't help everyone. What you are feeling is compassion and this is a great virtue to have, and sadly, one that is sorely lacking in today's world. You have no reason to feel bad or upset for the way that you feel because you want to help people like you and that you feel bad that there wasn't anything you could do for the people who lost their lives, that is not your fault. The sad truth is that like you said, you simply just cannot help everyone. You are just one person and even with that, at your age this is alot of pressure to put on yourself to expect that you could help everyone. We all wish that we could make the world a better place and take away all of the suffering in the world, but, without suffering there would be no compassion. You just have to step back and say ok I made it and now I am going to let myself be happy about that. You can still feel comapssion for the people who lost their lives, that is what makes you human, and a good one at that for the amount of compassion you obviously feel for others, but, you have a right to be happy too.


  Unfortunatly, bullying has been around forever and although more and more awareness is being brought to light about this, it does still exisit. I am so happy that youu have risen above this horrible epidemic and have gotten past it, that is always a great thing to hear. I know that some people who suffer at the hands of bullies aren't as lucky as you and you feel like why you? Why did you get to live when others had to die from this? This is called survivor grief and it is perfectly normal to feel this way.


  My advice to you? If you feel as strongly as your post leads me to believe that you do for anti bullying and you really want to help the people who lost their lives to bullying, then I recommend not letting them have died for nothing. Start a anti bullying campaign or club in your area. Get out there and educate people on the affects of bullying and what it does to people. Share your story and get the information out there and make sure that people know about how harmful bullying can be. This act alone will make you feel better knowing that you are actually doing something to stop this from happening to anyone else and you will also be keeping the memories of all those who died from bullying alive for their families and loved ones. And that sweetie is the best way you can help those who are gone and also to help yourself get past the grief and hurt you are feeling.
Profile Photo answered Oct 31, 2012 by Harrington ANGEL2000+ (2,540 points)   1 3 4
+1 vote

You can only deal with it one day at a time. Make every day worthwhile. You say you feel guilty because you get to wake up when others have not; so then make your days count for something. Yes, the world can be a real ugly place and there are many who need help. You cannot help everyone, but you help NO ONE by feeling sorry for yourself. Volunteer at a bully hotline or start an anti-bullying club/organization at your school. If you feel that strongly about it, do something to get involved. You do not need to rescue the whole world. You only need to put out your effort to make a positive impact.

It seems you are getting a handle on things, and working through the anxiety and depression. I am sorry you were bullied. For some reason, cruelty seems to be popular in the world today. All you can do is your best to fight it. Take it one day at a time, otherwise you are going to get completely overwhelmed. It is great that you are so grateful to be alive. Use this as motivation to help others. Again, like I said, while you cannot save everyone, you can still help others. Believe me, even if you only reach one person, it is still a HUGE accomplishment.

Hang in there. I think you are doing great. I am here if you want to talk. I hope this helped. Good luck ;)
Profile Photo answered Nov 2, 2012 by goodwill ANGEL24K (26,020 points)   5 11 52

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