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I don’t know what to do anymore

+1 vote
72 views
asked Dec 10, 2017 by anonymous  
I can’t tell you my name but  yes I have high functioning autism I have been getting tortured since I was 11 years old I have been bullied in every form I don’t go outside much because it’s difficult and it’s painful and I just get looked at like I’m an alien and I get laughed at and no one understands I am in my late teens and I have nothing to show for myself it seems like everyone is living better than I am I get mentally abused by my dad almost everyday he tells me how I will never have anything  and he tells me everything I can’t do he just brings me down even more and I’ve been depressed since 2013 I can’t take it anymore and I want to kill myself my whole body is always in pain mentally and physically. I don’t want to die alone but I guess that’s the way  it haves to be I guess they will get there wish people chuckle when they see me like this and they don’t care about me or my feelings. I’m currently looking for fast ways to kill myself without a lot of pain I know I will die without getting to experience anything in life and I will be fine with that why should I not kill my self just to keep going through pain? that doesn’t make since.  That’s all I ever wanted was to be happy
Country: United States
    

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2 Answers

0 votes
Profile Photo answered Dec 10, 2017 by HOPE ANGEL24K (61,970 points)   6 11 36
Dear Friend,

Thank you for sharing your story with us.
Are you seeing a doctor about the depression and pain? I strongly suggest you talk with school councilor or your parents, and ask for professional help.

"it seems like everyone is living better than I am" - This is just how it seems, but everyone has his/her own difficulties to deal with.   

I would like you to watch the movie Wonder or read the book this weekend. Like Auggie, please continue your journey to discover great friendship, your unique strength, and great purpose ... please never give up!

You are not alone! Call the helpline anytime:
The Lifeline (US) at 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
The Hopeline (US) at 1-800-SUICIDE (784-2433)


In your seemingly dark and cold world, be the match, after breaking the resistance, it ignites, giving out light and heat. Life is short, please make it shine ... HOPE
0 votes
answered Dec 11, 2017 by anonymous  
Hi,

I've struggled with hurts, hang-ups and habits, and there's been a lot of improvement for me. I've been taking anti-depressant medications. Also I've been working the 8 Principles of Celebrate Recovery. Part of my continued healing is that I share with others the solution. The 8 Principles of CR are:

1) Realize I’m not God. I admit that I’m powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing, and that my life has become unmanageable.
2) Earnestly believe that God exists, that I matter to him, and that he has the power to help me recover.
3) Consciously commit my life and will to Christ’s care and control.
4) Openly examine and confess my faults to God, to myself and to someone I trust.
5) Voluntarily submit to every change God wants to do in my life, and humbly ask him to remove my character defects.
6) Evaluate all my relationships. Offer forgiveness to those who have hurt me and make amends for harm I’ve done to others, except when to do so would harm them or others.
7) Reserve a daily time with God for self-examination, Bible reading and prayer in order to know God and his will for my life and to gain the power to follow his will.
8) Yield myself to God to be used to bring this good news to others, both by my example and by my words.

Celebrate Recovery, a fellowship of people recovering from hurts, hang-ups and habits. To find a group:
http://locator.crgroups.info

My recovery story, plus other information for life, can be found here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Khujx17Q7c

Thanks for reading this.

May peace be with you,
Anonymous

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