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I am done. I have read all the way, I have written all the ways I thought I would want to live for. I do not see any reason anymore. I am about to graduate high school but I don't see the reason to go to the ceremony anymore, nor does my mother, but she didn't care about any of the achievements I had anyway. This isn't one of those "my family never cared about me so now I want to end it" because quite frankly you get used to that feeling when it happens at an early age. I just don't know who I am nor want to know who I am anymore I just want to feel free again. I don't want to grow up nor do I care about anything anymore. I have friends, they're nice but I always was the one who could be left out if wanted to. I just simply need something where it won't end in me dying painfully. Aspirin I know is a horrible way to go out, jumping off a bridge (our bridge isn't that high nor in a secluded place), gunshot (I simply don't want to leave a mess and have it be more of a way to hate me), and overdose I would have to de secluded but the only reasoning I could have behind that is not being able to sleep but they wouldn't believe me. So does anyone, without the hopeless "life is great" "have you tried suicide hotline" (yes I have felt too numb for it as well and awkward) have any ideas? I am fine with the overdose but I just need to know which one to get and how good it will work.
    

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5 Answers

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by  
Hum... one thing you could do, that would take you completely out of your current status and place, is to just start walking. Pick a direction and put one foot ahead of the other and keep on going. The worst that can happen is that you'll die from exposure, so try this in relatively good weather. And as you go, ask people what to do....

Say something like: "Hi, I'm leaving where I was and don't even know how to be homeless. Can you offer a suggestion?"

Someone will feed you, someone will give you advise. If they shoot you, well there you go, you've attained that end. But I'll bet a new life will find you if you just work hard at walking till something happens.

You are trying to leave people behind... see if this idea will fit. You can always walk back or try something else.
0 votes
Profile Photo by HOPE ANGEL24K (63.5k points)   6 11 38
Dear Anonymous,

Life is an unique journey. It is ok if you don't see the reason at this time. Please just keep moving forward and looking for it with an open and positive mind.   

I am sure your mother, friends, and others close to you all care about you. As you know, many people are not good at expressing how they feel.

I understand that you feel pain inside. It is not permanent and there are real solutions, so please do not give up and do not believe the illusion of ending it.

We all need help in our life. It is not awkward at all to call the hotline (1-800-273-TALK (8255)) or ask for professional help. It is like visiting the doctor when we are sick.

I won't tell you "life is great". As we speak, many people are living in "hell" ... About 800 million people in our world do not have enough food to lead a healthy active life. That's about one in nine people on earth ...
However, I believe that you are so unique and capable. You are able to make your life great and make others' life great ...

Sharing with you one of my favorite poem from Mother Teresa:

Life is an opportunity, benefit from it.
Life is beauty, admire it.
Life is a dream, realize it.
Life is a challenge, meet it.
Life is a duty, complete it.
Life is a game, play it.
Life is a promise, fulfill it.
Life is sorrow, overcome it.
Life is a song, sing it.
Life is a struggle, accept it.
Life is a tragedy, confront it.
Life is an adventure, dare it.
Life is luck, make it.
Life is too precious, do not destroy it.
Life is life, fight for it.

May God and Angels Guide You to make the right and wise decision
0 votes
by  
Hang in there. There is a reason you are being tried. The Lord tries us through the fire like steel. I believe that proves HE Ahas faith in you and believes you are worthy of refining. We cant possibly understand what only the Lord can see. Trust in Him...and hold on to that faith. Maybe one of these days you will come across someone feeling like you do now and you can understand and empathize with them. Perhaps your experience will give someone else the courage to pull through the darkness. You are not alone and everything happens for a reason. Ask Him to help you through it and make you strong. He will not forsake you.
0 votes
Profile Photo ago by dolphin007 ANGEL24K (253k points)   7 7 12
WHAT HAPPENS IN HEAVEN WHEN WE PRAY?

https://www.catholicshare.com/these-are-the-3-powerful-prayers-exorcists-use-to-drive-out-evil-you-can-use-it-too/#axzz5aJS8bqNa

This is one of the nicest e-mails I have ever seen !!
 
I dreamed that I went to Heaven and an angel was showing me around. We walked side-by-side inside a large workroom filled with angels. My angel guide stopped in front of the first section and said, 'This is the Receiving Section. Here, all petitions to God said in prayer are received.
 
I looked around in this area, and it was terribly busy with so many angels sorting out petitions written on voluminous paper sheets and scraps from people all over the world.
 
Then we moved on down a long corridor until we reached the second section.
 
The angel then said to me, "This is the Packaging and Delivery Section. Here, the graces and blessings the people asked for are processed and delivered to the living persons who asked for them." I noticed again how busy it was there. There were many angels working hard at that station, since so many blessings had been requested and were being packaged
for delivery to Earth.
 
Finally at the farthest end of the long corridor we stopped at the door of a very small station. To my great surprise, only one angel was seated there, idly doing nothing. "This is the Acknowledgment Section, my angel friend quietly admitted to me. He seemed embarrassed.
"How is it that there is no work going on here? I asked."
 
"So sad," the angel sighed. "After people receive the blessings that they asked for, very few send back acknowledgments."
 
"How does one acknowledge God's blessings? "I asked.
 
"Simple," the angel answered. Just say, "Thank you, Lord."
 
"What blessings should they acknowledge?" I asked.
 
"If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof overhead and a place to sleep you are richer than 75% of this world.
If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a dish, you are among the top 8% of the world's wealthy, and if you get this on your own computer, you are part of the 1% in the world who has that opportunity."
 
"If you woke up this morning with more health than illness.. You are more blessed than the many who will not even survive this day."
 
"If you have never experienced the fear in battle, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation... You are ahead of 700 million people in the world."
 
"If you can attend a church without the fear of harassment, arrest, torture or death you are envied by, and more blessed than, three billion people in the world."
 
"If your parents are still alive and still married.... you are very rare."
 
"If you can hold your head up and smile, you are not the norm, you're unique to all those in doubt and despair......."
 
"Ok," I said. "What now? How can I start?"
 
The Angel said, "If you can read this message, you just received a double blessing in that someone was thinking of you as very special and you are more blessed than over two billion people in the world who cannot read at all."
 
Have a good day,count your blessings, and if you care to, pass this along to remind everyone else how blessed we all are..........
 
ATTN: Acknowledge Dept.
"Thank you Lord, for giving me the ability to share this message and for giving me so many wonderful people with whom to share it."
 
If you have read this far, and are thankful for all that you have been blessed with, how can you not send it on?
I thank God for everything, especially all my family and friends.
0 votes
ago by  
Connection and purpose.  They do not exist in your life.  I have felt similar feelings that you have stated at various times in my life.  Having friends, family and co-workers around you but there is a disconnect.  I thought about ending it, but it was the lack of living that was the problem, not the need to die.  Stan's answer is actually the best one I read, because it works.  Do a full reset on your life.  Set out on a direction; physically or figuratively (University, new trade, volunteer work, or just wander and do odd jobs to get by).  The pressures will disappear and calm will come.  Your old life will have died and you will make a new one.  The calm of your new life will open up opportunities to feel and find like minded people.  

You are not alone in feeling this way.  Good luck on your new journey -- Life!!!!!

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IN CASE OF EMERGENCY, PLEASE CALL 911 ( 999, 112, 111, or ... ) OR GO TO YOUR NEAREST EMERGENCY ROOM.

If you or someone you know is in an emotional distress or suicidal crisis, please also call:
The Lifeline (US) at 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
The Hopeline (US) at 1-800-SUICIDE (784-2433)
National Domestic Violence (US) at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
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The Trevor Project (US) at 1-866-488-7386
GLBT National Hotline (US) at 1-888-843-4564
TRANS Lifeline (US) at 1-877-565-8860
Crisis Text Line (US) Text START to 741741
Samaritans (UK) at 08457 90 90 90
Mind Infoline (UK) at 0300 123 3393
Rethink Mental Illness (UK) at 0300 5000 927
Breathing Space (Scotland) at 0800 83 85 87
Samaritans (Ireland/ROI) at 1850 60 90 90
1life (Ireland/ROI) at 1800 24 7 100
The Lifeline (New Zealand) at 0800 543 354
The Lifeline (Australia) at 13 11 14
NGF Hopeline (Philippines) at (632) 804-HOPE(4673) or 2919
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