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ago by  
I am here and I dont expect to be answered, I just want to compose my thoughts.'cause I dont have anyone to talk to. I cant share my problems to anyone but myself. I cant stop thinking. and I cant do anything but to think.Of how am I going to be able to solve all of my problems. I dont know if this is normal. But All I can feel is numbness. Depression. Fear. I think its slowly eating me.

To tell you guys the truth.. I have a big family. I have a girlfriend. and I have a job. I've been working for 3 years now. I am only 25 years old. And I live here in Makati City, Philippines.

My problem is. I have a lot of debts. It started 2 years ago. when a workmate introduced me to a loan shark here in our office. at first i am hesitant. I am shy. but i tried it anyway. And the rest is history.I started to miss deadline of payments. So what I will do is to find another person to borrow money. What happen was, Everytime that I need to pay a debt, I will ask someone to lend me some cash and I'll use it to pay my prior loan. It became a cycle. Its like im working but my salary is just for payments. Because of interest etc. I just want to have a peace of mind again. I just want to free myself from too much thinking. I cant ask my family  cause i dont have obligations or responsiblity to them. And I am shy because, maybe theyre thinking that I dont have a problem because I have my whole salary to me. just for myself. They dont know that Im drowning of fear and sadness right now.

My salary is only 15000 Philippine Peso a month. and my debts grown to a whopping 200,000
 Philippine pesos. I dont know what to do. I just want to be able to sleep without thinking about all of it. Without worrying of my debt in the morning. Im so tired. My problem is myself. I just want to be able to pay all of it at once. and to be able to save and help my family.

I want to turn my life around. I cant grow, I cant move forward. Its eating me. I really dont know what to do.  I just pray. I always talk to God to help me. help me solve my problems. I cant share it to anyone. even my Girlfriend is clueless of whats happening to me as of this moment. Im afraid that she might think that she doesnt have a future with me. That I am a miserable piece of thrash. Most of the time.. Im talking to myself. wishful thinking that God will use someone to help. Im not asking help for free. Ofcourse i will pay it back. its just, its hard to manage and be able to pay alot of people at once. So im thinking that if someone will lend me cash to pay for all of my debts and The burden of thinking  of paying many people will be gone. cause I will just need to pay one person every month.

I know i cant express my thoughts properly. that some may misunderstand me.  Its hard. Im tired.
If anyone accidentally read this. I just want to thank you.for listening. for taking time reading my miserable story. and I want to say sorry. Cause i know i wont be having such problems if I just became contented. If i just lived within my means. I just cant continue with my situation like this. I just want to have a peace of mind. thats all I can dream off right now." Peace of mind."
Country: Philippines

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1 Answer

0 votes
Profile Photo ago by dolphin007 ANGEL24K (253k points)   7 7 12

This is one of the nicest e-mails I have ever seen !!
I dreamed that I went to Heaven and an angel was showing me around. We walked side-by-side inside a large workroom filled with angels. My angel guide stopped in front of the first section and said, 'This is the Receiving Section. Here, all petitions to God said in prayer are received.
I looked around in this area, and it was terribly busy with so many angels sorting out petitions written on voluminous paper sheets and scraps from people all over the world.
Then we moved on down a long corridor until we reached the second section.
The angel then said to me, "This is the Packaging and Delivery Section. Here, the graces and blessings the people asked for are processed and delivered to the living persons who asked for them." I noticed again how busy it was there. There were many angels working hard at that station, since so many blessings had been requested and were being packaged
for delivery to Earth.
Finally at the farthest end of the long corridor we stopped at the door of a very small station. To my great surprise, only one angel was seated there, idly doing nothing. "This is the Acknowledgment Section, my angel friend quietly admitted to me. He seemed embarrassed.
"How is it that there is no work going on here? I asked."
"So sad," the angel sighed. "After people receive the blessings that they asked for, very few send back acknowledgments."
"How does one acknowledge God's blessings? "I asked.
"Simple," the angel answered. Just say, "Thank you, Lord."
"What blessings should they acknowledge?" I asked.
"If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof overhead and a place to sleep you are richer than 75% of this world.
If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a dish, you are among the top 8% of the world's wealthy, and if you get this on your own computer, you are part of the 1% in the world who has that opportunity."
"If you woke up this morning with more health than illness.. You are more blessed than the many who will not even survive this day."
"If you have never experienced the fear in battle, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation... You are ahead of 700 million people in the world."
"If you can attend a church without the fear of harassment, arrest, torture or death you are envied by, and more blessed than, three billion people in the world."
"If your parents are still alive and still married.... you are very rare."
"If you can hold your head up and smile, you are not the norm, you're unique to all those in doubt and despair......."
"Ok," I said. "What now? How can I start?"
The Angel said, "If you can read this message, you just received a double blessing in that someone was thinking of you as very special and you are more blessed than over two billion people in the world who cannot read at all."
Have a good day,count your blessings, and if you care to, pass this along to remind everyone else how blessed we all are..........
ATTN: Acknowledge Dept.
"Thank you Lord, for giving me the ability to share this message and for giving me so many wonderful people with whom to share it."
If you have read this far, and are thankful for all that you have been blessed with, how can you not send it on?
I thank God for everything, especially all my family and friends.

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