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i am feeling extreme depressed due to a crisis which ive been through,which i have brought on myself, i didnt intend to at all, it just happened. Now my family have found out and they are incredibly angry, frustrated and disappointed in me. Every night since i cry myself to sleep and i just want to end this pain which i am feeling but suicide but i can't bring myself to do it. Previously this year i did self-harm and that almost broke my family apart but what i have done now, im suprised that we are still together as a family. I just want to stop feeling this pain and move on. I am trying to think positive but it is so hard to do. My whole chest hurts because of stress which i have brought on. I get about 4 chest pains a day now and they last up to an hour each.
Is there anything i can do to help myself?
Country: england nottingham
    

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Profile Photo by justdavenow ANGEL18K+ (21.9k points)   4 6 16
First, understand that life is like this for sooo many people. It just happened. Yes, and life hurts now. There is guilt, there are problems with family, it doesn't seem as though it will ever get better. Friend, none of us, not a single one, has no guilt. None of us. Some people aren't even consciously aware of their personal guilt. They push it aside, reinterpret it, reinvent their own mental reality. And what I have found is that those who are most likely to point fingers are carrying a lot of hidden guilt, more than others. Why do I tell you these things? You are no worse, in any way, than any other person on this planet. I promise. Gently put that guilt down on the road and turn and walk away from it. There is a Power in this universe which takes care of these things and I want assure you, this is ok. Its already taken care of. These are my words to you - smile little one, it will be ok. As you consider this new reality, that all is taken care of and healed, begin to put yourself and your life back together again. And smile at yourself. You deserve a smile. I smile for you. My best
by   1 flag
Thanks i will try and think positive as much as i can, its just sooooo hard, the stress that i am under is alot and because of all this stress i am giving myself chest pains, it doesnt matter how many tablets i take they dont do anything. I dont take anymore tablets than needed i swear but i just feel like i should just end my life but im trying to keep my head up as much as i can. Everynight i cry myself to sleep because i cant bare the pain and every morning i just wish that i died in my sleep. I just wanna talk to someone but i cant because it will affect my future and my career but ive seriously dissappointed my parents, my mum can barely look at me anymore and my dad has just well forgotten about it, but my mum just looks at me with a dead look, no emotion at all and when i explained to her about how i am getting chest pains she just said 'well that's your fault', i just wish i could just fall asleep and not wake up :(
Profile Photo by justdavenow ANGEL18K+ (21.9k points)   4 6 16
Ok. Lets dig a little deeper here. You need to talk. Probably to someone face to face. I totally understand that. You have your father, there's no angst there from what I can tell. Mom isn't an option at this time. And there are possible career repercussions. I strongly suggest sitting down with a mental health therapist/counselor. I'm not suggesting you are mentally ill, they are just really good at listening and helping people through tough problems. I've done it. Is this a possibility for you?
by  
hey, i know you probably dont think taking advice from a teenager is a good idea but im cursed with the gift of two people in my head, i know the feeling of what you are going through, i have to some extendd my parents said to my brother that they dont even want to come home my brother is the only child they are proud o, in my head i know im a failure... but that dosent hold me back, you just have to learn to cope to push it back , it cant control you engross you ... im not saying forget it,, thats not what to do you have to lessen it whatever you have done it cant be tha strong, we have all done unimaginagble things in our lifes the strongg ones are the ones who know that an live, i think you can. I think that you just need some light, i have social anxiety and ive have been so close to suiside, I actually attempted it but te other person took control and he got me help,  im still here and at the smallest thing ill freak out but i cope, the human mind and body are amazing things this isnt the be all end all. Youstill can live, still love, still be happy. Go get help they are your family if you insist theyll take you to someone who can help a private councellor, they are your familythey are with you no matter what you do

Alex {hoping it will help}

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