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my close relative has had depression for a long time, but just recently been diagnosed. A few weeks ago he called me extremely intoxicated saying he just needed to talk and that he was feeling extremely upset about his life etc.i wasn't sure how to talk to him because i have never been in that situation and i was scared to say anything that might make him more upset but i talked to him for 3 hours over the phone and felt i had him calmed down,even laughing, and i made sure to have him call me the next day. later that night he attempted suicide, and was in the hospital for some time.I felt guilty that i wasn't able to help him more and that i didn't go to see him to make sure he was alright that night. He is now on anti-depressants and is doing group and one-on-one therapy, which seems to have helped him a lot. Today was his birthday and he went out with a few close friends to get drinks, and drunkenly called me telling me he needed to talk again. this time we met in person and we had a long conversation about how hes been feeling and just his emotions in general. i literally have no idea what to do in this situation, i feel like i am not helping him at all, but he said i made him feel a lot better, but i wish i could do more. i made sure his father knew about what was going on and got him to call and they had a talk which didn't end 100% well but i think that it'll open the door to being able to talk more. i walked him home and made sure he was in bed and told him to call me as soon as he wakes up. i also told my own mother, just in case. im just completely scared i dont want him to feel like hes alone or unloved. i dont want to miss a call from him ever and him to think i ignored it. i just would like some helpful words or something to let me know i did okay or even some tips if there is a next time (hopefully not!), even any words of encouragement i can pass along to him i would be thankful!!
Country: Canada

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4 Answers

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Dear to whom it may concern it is always a great help when a friend can be an ear to someone. You did perfectly well as you listened to your friend on the phone and was there. That would of been helpful for your friend to know your there. It's not your fault when your friend attempted suicide as people do it for self related things. I would say to keep being an ear to your friend and pray for them. Then no matter the out come at least you know you did everything in your power to help. For we can only help those who accept help.
From a friend who cares for you...
0 votes
Dear Friend, I am glad that you did what you did in talking with him.  Another person there really helps.  I know this may sound harsh, but you can't be there all the time for him.  You being there is great, but no human being can give him a purpose or a drive to live for more than temporarily at best. The other option is God.   He even said that even more bluntly.  Isaiah 57:21, "There is no peace, saith my God, to the wicked. "  Who are the wicked?  Everyone.  Jeremiah 17:9, "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it? "  Romans 3:23, "For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God."  glory means beauty, highness, perfection.  Who is God?  Isaiah 57:15a, "For thus saith the high and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity, whose name is Holy;..."    Genesis 1:1, "In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth." (Holy means perfect and separate from all that is imperfection and wrong.  Created means made from nothing.  -eth in old English does the same as an -s)God even has a separate place to be for eternity for sinners.  Revelations 21:8, "But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death." Revelation 20:10, "And the devil that deceived them was cast into the lake of fire and brimstone, where the beast and the false prophet are, and shall be tormented day and night for ever and ever." (whoremonger is a prostitute) So how can you, your friend, myself, or any one else for that matter, ever have peace?  Romans 6:23, "For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."  A gift is free for us to receive it.  Who is Jesus Christ?  He is the same God I've been talking about.  John 10:30, "I and my Father are one. "  However, he came to earth for the purpose "that He by the grace of God should taste death for every man."(Hebrews 2:9)  John 3:16, "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but  have everlasting life."   So what do you do?  Romans 10:9, "That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. "  And after salvation, you have a purpose-serve him who saved you, and telling other people. 1 Peter 1:15-16 " But as he which hath called you is holy, so be ye holy in all manner of conversation;  (16)  Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy."
I hope this helps.
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Profile Photo by HOPE ANGEL24K (66k points)   7 11 38

"Our importance is not only based on us partaking in The Light, but also because we all have an important task to fulfil while here on earth. As one NDEr put it: “No-one would be here unless we have a task.” "

"One task that NDErs seem to agree on is to learn about love. We do that in a world limited by time and space where we have to make our choices. Many NDErs will agree we have a free will and we are free to choose our way through our world. But since we are part of a Unity Universe our interconnectedness makes that everything we do has an effect somewhere else. All our actions, even the seemingly insignificant ones, ripple through the universe. They have an effect. They do something. They create. Actually, we create. We have a creative power through what we do and think. One NDEr said:
Everything I do has influence on everything.… Nothing is lost. It is a kind of law of conservation of energy. That is why we shouldn’t do to others what we don’t want for ourselves. Moreover, what we send, we’ll attract. We should also be mindful of our thoughts, because we create with our thoughts.

Through our choices we learn about love. From life-reviews we know that we always have many options in life. And the more difficulties we have in life, the more interesting the options become that we can choose from. It seems to be very beneficiary when we would choose for those options that bring love and peace. This means that it is best to act in accordance with our inner core, which is our particle of The Light. When we do that, we create positive ripples that travel through the universe. They have a soothing, healing, energising and/or inspiring effect somewhere, and it is bound to return to us in some or other form."

God Bless You, Angel!!
0 votes
Dear Canada,
Just being there and listening to him makes a difference.  You did everything that you could.  Even if you had checked on him, he would likely have made the attempt.  If you think he is suicidal call the police.  He needs more help than you can give him.  Make a contract or agreement with him that states if he is not feeling safe he will tell you and agree to get the help he needds.  Now this does not mean he will follow the agreement you put forth, but you are taking steps to help him.  He has to takes steps too.  You cannot take them for him.  He is lucky to have you

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