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Fell ill at 40 from a lifetime of anxiety and depression, just  living in a fog from all the meds. I see no future at all, and each day is just one more waiting to die. Have a nice place in my garage to hang a rope, that's how my uncle did it. It is like planning  slow enough so it does not scare me. Been cleaning up all my papers and other documents to make it easier for my family to sort through. It feels like gaining back some control, even lie to my doctor so he will not lock me up again. BEYOND HELP? I think I am.
Country: Canada
    

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3 Answers

0 votes
Profile Photo by HOPE ANGEL24K (64.4k points)   7 11 38
When we are depressed, it is very easy to confuse ... so please allow me to make it very clear: death maybe the final destiny of your life but it is NOT the goal.

Please keep exploring and looking for a real goal for your life. Don't let depression define the quality and value of your life. You CAN do and achieve a lot even with it.

If I have the honor to give you a challenge in the new year:
Find four nonprofit organizations you respect and spare some of your time every week to volunteer for them.

If you can not make yourself SMILE, you CAN help others achieve that ...

You are never alone!

I am praying for you ...
+1 vote
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Dear friend,  I would like to tell you not to be stressed or depressed, but it's just words when these emotions run so high.  No one can tell you differently.  But trust me when I say you're not the only one that feels these in their daily lives.  Society promotes these - emphasizing one's social, employment, and financial status.  When it comes down to it, these things mean nothing.  You need to ask yourself if you are a good person and treat people the way you want to be treated.  Obviously you care.  You had mentioned you were getting things cleaned up for your family.  So tell me exactly how you're going to clean-up their stress, guilt, and depression when you're taken away from them?  You know personally how hard this is, so if they mean so much to you, don't think about putting them through it.  If you feel in a fog from the meds and still have these thoughts, maybe they aren't the right meds for you.  See another doctor.  Doctors don't know everything.  They learn from trial and error.  They can be challenged to.  Also, don't be afraid to talk about what's bothering you.  By just letting it out, getting it off your chest, and not necessarily looking for answers, can be a big relief.  I'm not saying you have to do this with a professional.  Is there someone you can confide in?  Don't be afraid.  If someone judges, then they're not the right person to talk with. I assure you that everyone has issues whether big or small.  If you really think about your needs to make you happy, I think you're going to find that you have everything you need.  All those other things mean nothing and even less as you grow older.  I'm sure whether you have recognized it or not, you've made a valuable difference in this world and all who know and love you want you around for a very long time.  I hope this has helped to make you feel better. :)
0 votes
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Hey, did you know that life does not end at death?  Secondly, why would anyone want to go around all depressed forever, and have nothing to change about it because you can't end it?

Look, I am trying to get your attention, because what you are talking about is wrong.  Please don't do this.  THERE IS HOPE.  Hope where?  In God.  Yes, you may be sick, but he is the Physician.  You may be lost and confused, but he is the Comforter and the Way.  You may be at a dead end, but he is the Creator.  He made you for a purpose, so yes there is a purpose for living.  But we don't have hope in ourselves.  

Let me show you how I know that.
 Revelations 4:11, "Thou art worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honour and power:for thou hast created all things, and for thy pleasure they are and were created."

Romans 3:23, "For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God."

Isaiah 57:20, " But the wicked are like the troubled sea, when it cannot rest, whose waters cast up mire and dirt. "

Romans 6:23a, "For the wages of sin is death, ...."

There is life after death...
Luke 16:22b,23, "...the rich man also died, and was buried; And in hell he lift up his eyes, being in torments, and seeth Abraham afar off, and Lazarus in his *****."

Revelations 21:8, "But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death."

But there is a substitute.
Romans 6:23b, "..., but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."

Romans 5:7,8, "For scarcely for a righteous man will one die:yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to die.  But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us."

John 10:30, "I and my Father are one."

John 3:13, " And no man hath ascended up to heaven, but he that came down from heaven, even the Son of man which is in heaven."  

John 3:16, "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life."  (eternal life with God in glory)

Ephesians 2: 8,9, "For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: not of works, lest any man should boast."

We do not all have this gift of eternal life.  This word receive has its meaning as repent and act on it.  Luke 13:3, "I tell you, Nay: but, except ye repent, ye shall all likewise perish."
 Romans 10:9, "That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. "

John 14:6, "Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me. "

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